The Director

Oh Quantum >.< Why are you trying to get my favorite glitch patched?

A Homosapien presumably. Not sure what you are trying to ask here.

That it's sometimes difficult. And the fact that you have to sneak out is pretty odd as well. It's odd that they have a mandatory education system in the first place, but when you think about it school is more like a prison than an education. They make kids not want to be there with how hard they strive to keep them there. Did you know that in some states your parents can go to jail if you don't show up to school?

Alright, so the Minecraft Playdate has been officially sanctioned, and an award made for it. There are only two things left to do. Pick a date... and select world hosts. We need world hosts for PC and for X-Box. A good connection is preferred, but not required. Don't worry about people coming onto your worlds and screwing them up either, we will all be starting fresh on the same Seed. The Playdate will be on a Saturday. How soon that Saturday is depends on who is willing to help out with it. If you would like to be a world host on this Playdate, please copy paste this form and fill it in. Gamertag:(your XBL Gamertag, if you are on PC then leave this blank) Platform:(PC or X-Box) Connection Type:(Good, Bad, Or Wal-Mart?) Availability:(How available you will be. Half a Saturday, the whole day, the whole day and night, etc) Not everyone who applies will be accepted as hosts, and those who are accepted will be PM'd. PMing me does not increase your chances of being chosen. Alright, let's do this.

Did you know that the color of John 117's eyes have never been mentioned in any of the canon books?

Alright, since Minecraft is a pretty popular game on the 360, and since I seem to be the expert on explaining how to get achievements, I thought I would go ahead and teach you how to get all the achievements for Minecraft. A good chunk of the achievements you can get from playing the tutorial, so I won't spend much time on those. There are a few, however, that are a bit difficult. There are 20 in total equaling 400 Gscore. Here are the super easy ones, they can be done on any difficulty: 1. Taking Inventory - Open your inventory by pressing Y. 2. Getting Wood - Punch a tree until a block of wood pops out by holding right trigger. 3. Benchmarking - Craft a Workbench with four blocks of wooden planks. 4. Time to Mine! - Craft a wooden pickaxe. 5. Hot Topic - Craft a furnace using 8 cobblestone blocks. 6. Acquire Hardware - Smelt an iron ingot. You do this by putting Iron Ore into a furnace with some coal (or some other fuel). You can find Iron Ore in almost any mine you make. 7. Time to Farm - Craft a wooden hoe. 8. Getting an Upgrade - Craft a stone pickaxe. It has to be a stone pickaxe, can't be iron, gold, or diamond. 9. Time to Strike - Craft a wooden sword. 10. Cow Tipper - Hunt and kill a cow and harvest leather from it. 11. MOAR tools - Craft one of each tool (Pickaxe, Spade, Axe, and a Hoe). You can make them from whatever you want to make them from, but wood is cheapest. To do a two birds with one stone (pun) here, craft a stone pickaxe and wooden everything else. See? Over half of them are super easy. Now for the ones that take a little bit of doing: 12. Bake Bread - Turn Wheat into Bread. Break several tall grass blocks (which grow on dirt blocks, above ground) until you collect three seeds. Use the hoe on three dirt blocks to create farmland using left trigger (grows faster near water) and plant one seed on each block of farmland. Wait for the wheat to grow. Gather the wheat once it finishes growing and go to the crafting table and create some bread. Furnace is not required. At all. Another way to do this is to find a village and harvest their wheat. You only need 3 to make bread. 13. The Lie - Bake a Cake. Collect 3 Milk Buckets. You will need three buckets, and will need to use each bucket on a Cow to obtain Milk. You can milk the same cow three times. Grow 3 Wheat from Seeds (or find a village and harvest from there). Find or grow 2 Sugar Cane and go to the crafting table to make sugar. Follow a Chicken around for 4–5 minutes or, if you are lucky, you may stumble upon an Egg laid by a Chicken already. You should now have 3 milk buckets, 3 wheat, 2 sugar, and one chicken egg. Go to a crafting table and craft a cake using these ingredients. 14. Delicious Fish - Catch and Cook a fish. To get this achievement, all you really have to do is take a cooked fish out of a furnace's smelted slot. So, if you've got nice friends, you don't have to learn how to fish. If you do not know how to fish, then I suggest you use the tutorial to learn. Then you can just cook the fish you find in the tutorial for this achievement. 15. Monster Hunter - Attack and Destroy a Monster. This achievement has to be done on at least easy difficulty. And YOU have to be the one to kill the monster. If you attack a creeper with a sword and it explodes, you will not get the achievement. If you've got dogs and they do the dirty work, there's a chance you won't get the achievement. If one of your friends does most of the damage on the mob, there's a chance you won't get the achievment. 16. Leader of the Pack - Tame 5 Wolves. You will need quite a few bones for this one, which can be got by killing skeletons. You will need to find five wolves, and feed each of them bones until a collar appears around their neck. There will be hearts as well. Another way to do this is to find one wolf, save, tame the wolf, then reload the save five times. Breeding wolves does not count towards this achievement. You can tame four wolves and breed them one thousand times and you will not get this achievement until you tame another wolf. 17. Dispense with This - Craft a Dispenser.The reason this is here is because it takes a bit of doing. First, you will need a bow (made by three string and three sticks, you get the string from spiders or by using shears on web found in abandoned mines). Then, you will need some cobblestone and redstone dust. Redstone dust is actually more common than one may think, you just need to look for it. If you are having major difficulty finding some, try either switching worlds, playing on a friends world who has the ingredients, or mining in a different area. Okay, here are the three more difficult ones. These ones will probably end in tears for you at least once or twice. Well, here they are, as best as I can explain them: 18. Into The Nether - Construct a Nether Portal. For this one you will need a flint and steel (which can be made with flint and iron one for each) and Obsidian, which can only be mined with a diamond Pickaxe. However, there's a little trick you can do with a few buckets of lava and water. Here's an AH video explanation. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xCJ0RmiYixM Note, in the video he uses more than two buckets. You only really need two buckets to do this, but that's up to your imagination. 19. When Pigs Fly - Ride a Pig using a Saddle and make the Pig take Fall Damage. Okay, for this one you will need to find a dungeon then find a saddle in one of the "dungeon chests" near the Mob Spawner. This is mainly a matter of luck. However, World Seed 9000000000800000000700000006000000500000­40000300020010 has a dungeon located at X: -309 Y: 51 Z: 199. Video Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dx6Lz-gfiZs Once you find the saddle, you can find a village, get some carrots, get some string, and some sticks and make a carrot on a stick. This makes the achievement much easier. You put the saddle on a pig, get on the pig, press R with the carrot on a stick equipped to hit (or "tame") the pig, and you can lead it using the stick. Bear in mind that if you kill the pig with the stick, you do not get the achievement and sometimes they will not drop the saddle. If you lead the pig into water, you will lose control of the pig. Best thing to do is get off the pig and let it get to land. Then, just lead the pig off a cliff that won't kill you. 20. On A Rail - Travel by minecart to a point at least 500m in a single direction from where you started. This one requires A LOT of materials, and some know how with how to make an effective railway. All you have to do is make the railway straight. No turns at all. You can make it go up or down, but it needs to be straight. 500m = 500 blocks. So you are going to need quite a bit of iron and gold. Best practice is to have one powered rail per 10 iron rails. So Powered - Ironx10 - Powered. Remember, Powered rails need to be powered by redstone torches. If you need it, here's an Achievement Hunter guide. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tihfx6DunZs Well, there it is. The complete list of achievements for Minecraft. I hope this helped most of you who are reading it. I have changed X-Box's so I no longer have my old achievement help maps, so I can no longer offer personal assistance over XBL. Everything above has been confirmed for the X-Box 360, but may also work on the X-Box One, PS3, and PS4 versions of the game. This achievement guide was last updated 7/28/2014. Number of people helped with achievements over XBL so far: 158

888 is a world seed for the "when pigs fly" achievement that spawns you near a dungeon. I explain how to get this and other achievements here: http://www.343indust...elp-and-advice/ Also, there are quite a few ways to have fun with seeds. For instance, try entering your gamertag as a seed. If it spawns you in an awesome world, then Minecraft loves you. If not... well let's just say that for you creepers are probably just a little extra creepy ;D

No he wasn't. He had brown hair and freckles. A ginger is a red head. Did you know that you can control which direction you jump off of a Mongoose?

Username: The Director Country: The United States of America Keyword: 343 Industries.

Updated because of name changes

Depends on your definition of the word "dimension". If you mean a measurable kind of dimension, then yes. If you mean 1st - 10th dimensions, then no. The reasons why are pretty simple. You can measure time, which makes it a measurable dimension (like width, length, height, and depth). However, it is only part of many measurements that make up the 1st - 10th dimensions, and therefor can't be in and of itself one of the 10 dimensions (like a gear in a clock, the gear is not the clock, but is part of the clock).

Sweet We needed a daily joke thread.

42. This has been asked in different variants about 4 times now.

I got to Corporal. Arguably classical, but it really depends on the person's taste in music. Myself, I prefer symphonies, modern or classical.

Either by going to bed before sunset, or by being Muhammad Ali.

Did you know that in Halo CE, Halo 2, and Halo 3 that a plasma grenade would not stick to a players crotch? If it was aimed at the crotch, it would either count as a miss and sail past the player or connect to the lower torso/inner thigh areas instead.

Yay! I'm Admired Also, (and more importantly) am I the only one who stared at the .gif for a couple of minutes wondering what exactly that guy was so excited about? lol

What we are probably going to do is select "hosts", then have all the hosts create a new map at the same time with the same seed. That way, (due to the XBL lobby being limited to 8 people) we do not have to boot players from a game so that everyone can see the "community map". And I'm having people choose between PC and XBL because I need to decide how many hosts we need to make this playdate possible.

Okay, so it looks like a lot of people would like a Minecraft Playdate. This poll is to determine how many hosts we should have for the PC if a playdate does happen, or if a PC playdate should happen, so please answer the questions above honestly. This poll should be locked by the end of this month. So please vote as soon as you can. *Please Note* If you have it for X-Box, but not for PC, good for you. That is not at all relevant to this poll. Those trying to start or participating in a PC vs Console flame war may have their posts deleted and warning points increased if not an outright ban. For those of you who do not have the PC version and have not filled out the previous survey, please click this link and fill it out. http://www.343industries.org/forum/topic/9180-minecraft-poll-please-participate-d/ Thanks for participating.